2022-12-19 12:58 pm

Warrior Nun Part 01

hi guys

Due to hot-mess living situation, I have begun distracting myself near-constantly with warrior nun (on netflix), all the accompanying fic, or township, the silly little townbuilding game i was obsessed with as a kid (yes the same one that heejin was recently on hslkdfj). my roommate has bore witness to my goofy freak out dance every time i see a good screenshot or read a good fic bc i cannot hide it anymore.

Anyways!

also this is gonna be part one. if i don't post this now i never will, but i have a bajillion more thoughts.

ExpandWARRIOR NUN (part 01) )

Expandquotes + tweets that make me feral: )
2022-04-25 06:18 pm
Entry tags:

Notes 001

alrighty so I, like every other person who uses this site, am going to word dump at random now I guess.  
  
really trying to get a hold on how the heck to use dw because i think it is such a fun idea and i love reading about other people's lives from little snippets and being able to tag your own silly little thinkpieces and looking back on them years later.   
  
also i spend like... the whole day yesterday reading ppl's journals and it's so interesting. like normally when you get a glimpse-glimpse into someone's life from an outside perspective, it's like a celebrity w a curated image or some funky vlogger. like even if they're totally unknown there's always the possibility of being seen--- by your family, your friends. maybe i just wasn't on tumblr/had a blog in its popular eras. anyways. there's the comfort of knowing that 3.5 people know what dreamwidth is and they're all across the world having their own lives but maybe they're perceiving me. also it feels like i'm talking to somebody instead of just addressing my future self.  
also when dw posts have the cut? i have no idea what it is but it gives me the feeling of a little gift; like ooooh i get to read more? this is actually so silly of me idk idc.  
using dw is also v text-based-feeling and i guess i sort of need that. i don't let myself draw in my physical journal (except i rlly do usually be spiraling when i use it, so.) bc i just need to keep it separate, yknow? sketchbooks r for art and occasional notes, but writing is writing. maybe it's because i look back on my art and feel ashamed of it, and i don't want my thoughts to be tainted by that? 

Expandfic writing vs art; incomplete thoughts )
 
i started this entry somewhere near a week ago but then was so caught up w life (aka our school's yearbook submission deadline and then a 30 pg history project 😑) that i never finished and posted it so i am Doing It Now while i avoid doing any of my french hw
 
sorry this is extraordinarily wordy i love when i see ppl posted on dw and it's super long idk it just feels kinda like when u get an ao3 subscribed chapter update
 
our yearbook was finished 3 minutes before the deadline and i am so grateful to my friend and also our advisor for staying up so late checking alignments and typos and visibility 
also i am salty-not-salty about the other 3 editors not working on it that night (even though i get that they have lives. like you committed to this. it is literally our final day.) bc it p much meant that we 3 had full final say over stuff
madison u will never see this but i love you (platonic) and actually think you are so cool and not just like in a you're-my-friend-ofc-i-think-you're-cool but like bro u r so overpowered and i think nyu is rlly losing out and i hope we stay friends even when we're middle-aged
 
i have been so sleep deprived recently it is Very Bad
also i have practicing driving a lot a lot bc my dad is going to taiwan this week and cannot drive me places. proud of myself i guess. do need to get more sleep though so i will be a safer driver
 
 
random thoughts i have had over the last few days:
 
i actually can't believe i passed my math test,,, like a 62 is nowhere near great but i thought i got like a 13 so that's a relief,,, perhaps i shant fail calc,,,
 
someone recced a fic on the discord, i thought it looked interesting, read the whole thing thru, thought it was good and tried to kudos, and ao3 told me i had alr kudosed and bookmarked it
but i had no memory of reading it?? hsdlkfj my memory is failing me
i seriously read it like it was the first time,,, how
 

2022-04-14 10:19 am

alice wu, the half of it, saving face

hnnnnn i Do Not know what I am doing this is my first time on dw actually doing anything but reading thru ppl's journals pls forgive me if this is incredibly incorrectly formatted (but hopefully if i screw smth up majorly i can go back and edit)

anyways

i watched saving face (2004) a few months ago, then the half of it (2020) maybe 3 days ago? then decided i needed to rewatch saving face. and. i don't think i've ever felt so seen?

ik ppl talk about representation, and honestly i was kind of satisfied w what i had? like yeah, it's shitty, having like 3 asian characters ever (esp in american animated stuff) but they were all just... physically asian, yknow?

Expandum me complaining ig sorry )
they were happy films, where asian americans are ~just like you~ and heroes and stuff (which i guess is good?), and tbh i was ok w that. idk. guess it's easy to feel satisfied w a tiny bit when your expectations are low. but like maybe it's growing up and the passage of time? that makes me want more? anyways representation actually changes lives

(and kpop is fun but like i am Not that pretty and i am also not korean nor do I actually relate(?) to it?)

and then comes alice wu.
(also i am perhaps overreacting a little but taiwanese!!! represent ✊) (also michelle krusiec + lynn chen also being taiwanese :))))
and saving face made me want to cry bc my parents would probably react the same way, even if they didn't say it to my face. also when wil's mom hugs her at the airport while she cries? maybe this is repressed i-want-my-parents-to-be-proud-of-me-and-show-it

this was a whole film!!! for the sapphics--- not just queer coded but like in a relationship and we are gonna talk about it ROMANCE
not just like 10 min of a background couple in an entire season of a tv show or smth the fandom is basically carrying
and it's so unabashedly chinese (ok detouring for a moment to say that i don't like china since i entirely do not agree w its one-china ideology but it would be inaccurate to say taiwanese here bc it is flushing, after all. but yeah. also they are somewhat culturally similar.) 

actually yk what i am too uncomfortable saying chinese so i am going to just change it to taiwanese; ik it's not correct but this is for me so

taiwanese-american lesbian films!!! r made for me 
maybe i haven't looked hard enough, but i don't think i've seen... any(?) taiwanese-american shows/movies, or happy ending lesbian ones? and alice wu just comes along and drops these 2 masterpieces and it's like everything i've wanted
also dressing in a tomboyish way but not like a fashionable one rlly spoke to me... ellie chu wil peng thank you (like granted this is when i had hair long enough to tie, but i had the same ponytail and clothing-type for actual ages. also the ellie chu glasses.)


Expandthe half of it )

Expandsaving face )

also joan chen is so so so pretty
when she winks at vivian's mom at the end when they freaking set their daughters up?@#$%#$% she looks so good

the half of it ao3 is decently healthy but pleaseeee saving face ao3 is holding on by a thread
also did u know younglegends wrote for safa? i screamed when i realized
full circle haha

i need to post this before i chicken out and/or add a bunch more incoherent thoughts; i've had this draft open since 10 am... it is now 2 pm 🙄

also please... if u have any recs for asian sapphic stuff pls lmk